{"id":17669,"date":"2012-06-08T21:06:35","date_gmt":"2012-06-08T20:06:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/carfree.fr\/?p=17669"},"modified":"2020-08-15T16:59:25","modified_gmt":"2020-08-15T15:59:25","slug":"les-poemes-pro-du-carrefour-bleme1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/2012\/06\/08\/les-poemes-pro-du-carrefour-bleme1\/","title":{"rendered":"Les po\u00e8mes pro du carrefour bl\u00eame\/1"},"content":{"rendered":"

1\/ D\u00e9claration assourdissante de futilit\u00e9 publique pour un remaillage gore-tex \u00ae du territoire \u00e9tanche \u00e0 l\u2019homme mais laissant transpirer le moteur. <\/p>\n

Vu les art\u00e8res bouch\u00e9es,
\nVu l\u2019obsolescence des muscles dans le r\u00e9seau de transport,
\nVu les voies d\u2019extinction du pi\u00e9ton silencieux,
\nVu son insalubrit\u00e9 ant\u00e9p\u00e9diluvienne,
\nVu l\u2019efficacit\u00e9 des autocro\u00fbtes\u00a0 et des bandes d\u2019arr\u00eat sur l\u2019h\u00e9morragie du corps social,
\nVu le droit et la ligne,<\/p>\n

Nous, haute auto tir\u00e9e des masses par la thermodynamique des urnes,<\/p>\n

d\u00e9cr\u00e9tons :<\/p>\n

– Par le King, la bagnole est reine\u00a0!
\n– \u00c9largissons les voies, densifions l\u2019habitacle et car-fourrons la ville\u00a0!
\n–\u00a0Raflons le p\u00e8ze en masse et enflons-en les flux\u00a0!
\n– Chauffons le lait d\u2019Urbanisme Hautement Terrifiant\u00a0!
\n– Rond-pointons les PLU, enseignons les ZAC, hyperm\u00e2chons les POS\u00a0!
\n– Tartanons les SCOT\u00a0!<\/p>\n

Puis, coudons le droit et bouclons la ligne \u00e0 la fin de la mesure par\u00a0:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0crucifixion des pi\u00e9tons sous tous les clous de la chauss\u00e9e,
\n–\u00a0pendaison des lents par technologie sans fil,
\n– immersion des chats et des po\u00e8tes dans les ondes magn\u00e9tiques,
\n–\u00a0R\u00e9tablissement de la selle \u00e9lectrique pour les p\u00e9docyclistes,<\/p>\n

Et gavage des pauvres en gondole jusqu\u2019\u00e0 n\u00e9cro-romance\u00a0 \u00e0 la caisse.<\/p>\n

Beaus\u00e9jour, 8 Juin 2012<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1\/ D\u00e9claration assourdissante de futilit\u00e9 publique pour un remaillage gore-tex \u00ae du territoire \u00e9tanche \u00e0 l\u2019homme mais laissant transpirer le moteur.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":537,"featured_media":38153,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[127,165,9],"tags":[292,846,101,835,921,35],"views":4655,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17669"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/537"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17669"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17669\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/38153"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17669"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17669"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carfree.fr\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17669"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}